Bitterness is AWFUL! Forgiveness is Tasty

by Sheila South

A The Kids & Me Contributor

I decided to grow a garden this summer and maybe mitigate the cost of fresh produce.  Not sure I have saved any money after the cost of watering every day though!  But there is a sweet tasting reward from homegrown fruits and vegetables - and cucumbers in particular; they are different from the ones at the store and their yummy crunch makes all the work worth the while. … at least it did. 

Lately, the cucumbers from the garden have had a bitter streak -literally- right through them.  I have been examining them closely when I cut them open because I detest that sharp taste and I am trying to figure out how to tell it is there BEFORE it goes in my mouth!  Sometimes, there is this white stripe going through a cucumber.  Cut that off pronto.  Yuck! Yuck!  But some of them do not have that tell-tale warning and I pop a slice of the crispy-cumber in my mouth only to have to promptly discard it.  It is happening so frequently now that I am actually apprehensive every time to try a new cucumber.

So, what is the lesson I have learned with the bitter cucumber struggle? 

Bitterness is AWFUL!

Having put the time and the work and the care and the concern into tilling the ground, planting the seeds, watering daily, and fighting off garden pests, I look forward to reaping the reward of the fruit.  To discover that it is bitter is such a disappointment and an aggravation and a frustration and an irritant. Makes me want to avoid cucumbers entirely for the rest of my life.  I’m certainly giving every new one the side-eye as I bring it in the kitchen remembering the last one that gave me such a yucky sensation.  Do you know where I am going with this?

It can be the same way with our people relationships.  We invest ourselves in relationships with others giving our time, energy, care, and concern expecting that we will reap the great fruit of connection, mutual support, love, and faithfulness.  But sometimes it does not work out that way.  The fruit we hope to harvest is rotten and does not sustain us.  Bitterness can even develop.

Bitterness cannot be allowed to hang around.  We have to spit it out!  Bitterness will jade our perception of all our relationships if we let it remain.  Bitterness will cause us to mistrust when there are no grounds, it will cause us to close our hearts to opportunities for growth, and it will overshadow otherwise healthy fruit.

God’s Word has a lot to tell us about bitterness.  Sometimes we might be tempted to hold on to bitterness, nurse it, and let it grow.  But we must intentionally pursue the spiritual flip-side of bitterness: forgiveness.  The Bible tells us we are to forgive others if we expect God to forgive us:

"For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." ~Matthew 6:14 -15

Bitterness is acidic and rooted deep in the heart:

“The root of bitterness is underground; it is easy to hide and camouflage. Seldom do you find anyone who will admit that they are a bitter person. They will either deny it or disguise it. A bitter person is hypersensitive, ungrateful, insincere, holds grudges, and has mood swings.

Bitterness will affect you physically, emotionally, and spiritually because the fruit of bitterness is an acid that destroys its container. When your heart is bitter, God will not be real to you be. Why? Because hatefulness and holiness do not dwell in the same heart. And without holiness you will not see the Lord (see Hebrews 12:14).” 1

"Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.” ~Hebrews 12:14-15 

Getting rid of bitterness and extending forgiveness are a decision we make much like the one I make to spit out a gnarly-tasting piece of cucumber!  And truly, just because one makes a decision to forgive does not mean one forgets.  I surely remember the taste of that nasty cuke!  But releasing bitterness does require that we do not harbor the feelings, we do not let them hang out rent-free in our heads, and we acknowledge when they surface and deal with them.  And for the sake of being healthy, we do not need to assume that every cucumber – every relationship – will end with bitter fruit.

Next time you see a cucumber, remember to beware of bitterness.

By the way, if anybody knows how to get rid of the bitterness when growing cucumbers, PLEASE LET ME KNOW. :)

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¹ Rogers, A. (2021, April 21) What Causes the "Root of Bitterness" and How to Get Rid of It. Crosswalk. https://www.crosswalk.com/faith/spiritual-life/the-root-of-bitterness-1167870.html